Wednesday, September 25, 2013

is it too soon...

for me time?

Playing catch-up
since I haven't been sharing with you
on a regular basis.

It all began with a sign.
This particular garage sale sign
I knew well.

A friendly gentleman and his wife
who used to sell antiques
now hold garage sales
throughout the summer.
I have learned that these are
not to be missed
Always cool stuff.

So I went
and I found...
but that's another story.

While there we struck up a conversation 
that went something like...
So...Mr. Lucarelli...
are you still active at the
upholstery shop?
(Al's Upholstery, here in Toledo...
a family business since 1930)
He sure was!
Next question.
Do you offer upholstery classes
because I have always wanted to learn?
pause*tilt of his head*pause
 I decided to
sweeten the pot since
I could see he was considering
the offer.
For an experienced seamstress?
Are you an experienced seamstress? He asked.
Yes. Yes, I am.
Because, he added, we are in need of a seamstress.

So I could learn the trade
while getting paid.

That got me to thinking for the rest
of the weekend.
Should I do this?
Do I want to do this?
Can I hold a job AND homeschool?
Did I want to throw something 
else at my already busy 
(on and on to tedium)
Could James be self-motivated enough
to allow me to
pull this off?
He assured me he could.

Went to check it out.
Discussed my concerns
the need for a flexible schedule
toured the shop
met my "would-be" co-workers
everything except pay...
my focus was on the learning.

Lifelong learning.
A concept that I want my guys
to not only hear about...
but to see in

The truth is
you don't know
until you're in it
how things are going to turn out.

To be honest...
I'm still in the
trying to figure it all out

In the meantime...
I'm finding I am eager to add
rather than weed out.
I was asked if I wanted to partake in
a Beth Moore Bible Study
(by a co-worker who knew I'd be interested)
Tuesday nights?
I found myself saying...
I'd love to!
And I would.
And I will.
Another lifelong learning moment
which brings me back
 to the original question.

Is it too soon for me time?

Is my focus being pulled from where
it should be...
namely, homeschool?
I could argue that I am
being a poster child for
 interest-led learning.
as I go about and grow
I am once again
feeling the guilt of motherhood
creep into my being.

the not doing enough
the doing too much...

Then there are
other obligations and priorities
that are getting nudged
to the side.
Make that two-scoops of guilt please.

Haven't I been through this before?
Like deja vu?
Why am I singing an old song?

It is what it is.
I am who I am.

As I struggle my way forward
it sure wouldn't hurt to ask the advice
of friends
who know what I'm going through...
who understand
what the heck I'm talking about
because we're on this road together.

Thank you, in advance
for your help
on this one.

1 comment:

  1. Yes! You need to feed yourself so that you have the energy to feed your family, right? So glad to hear your jumping at new opportunities. I'm trying to do the same here in my new town. Piano and cartoon classes for Sam. Bible study, stamp camps, and the embroiderer's guild for me. Open to new experiences wherever I see them. Send James to culinary school and give up the guilt. :)